Miami Police: Call in the Feds to Stop Shootings

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke calls for the federal government to investigate gang bangers. Across Miami-Dade County, black communities are under siege. Local…

The University of Miami’s Delta Gamma Recruitment Video Is Gross

The Delta Gamma sorority at the University of Miami released its 2015 recruitment video Thursday. What do bright-faced gals need to join the ranks? Aviator sunglasses, an endless supply of cut-off shorts, and pearly-white teeth — at least according to the video. For more than three minutes, the group of…

Rick Ross Gets Miami Heat Face Tattoo

The Bawse got that Fuego fever. After four straight trips to the NBA Finals and two championships, our Miami Heat (or el Miami Fuego, as the team is known during the National Basketball Association’s annual Noches Latinas) has gotten off to a lackluster start for this 2014-15 season. We lost…

Marco Rubio Will Never Be President

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke predicts Marco Rubio’s political future. Despite all his blustering about making a run for the Oval Office, Florida…

2015 Is Going To Be Crazy Weird

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke makes bold predictions for 2015. In 2014, people fed up with white cops killing unarmed black men marched…

Miami’s Ten Best Restaurants Reviewed in 2014

For Miami dining, 2014 was the year of simplicity. There was, as has long been the case, the onslaught of celebrity chefs planting their flags on our shores. But beyond these big names, homegrown culinary talent continued to boil down cuisine into its simplest, most delicious form…

Dear Trick Daddy: Please Open a Restaurant

Where has T double D been? Yes, yes Miami’s maestro of trill had a recent run-in with the law over cocaine, gun possession and driving with a suspended license. But more importantly the hometown hero has been putting in work in the kitchen. This explains the recent weight gain. But…

LeBron is Coming To Town, Let’s Be Nice About It

How you hanging in there Miami? I know, I know – you don’t want to talk about it. But we need to talk about this. He’s gone. He left and I know it hurts, but it is what it is. These things happen, people change and they move on and…

Cleo Offers Classy, Affordable Mediterranean Fare in SoBe

At Cleo, the Redbury Hotel’s new eatery, Danny Elmaleh proffers a dip called lebaneh. To make it, the soft-spoken chef-partner lets kefir cheese drain for 48 hours and then adds olive oil, lemon juice, and za’atar (his version is a blend of thyme, sesame seeds, and sumac). Finally, he tosses…

The U Part 2 Got It Wrong: Nevin Shapiro Is Not Like Me

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke makes it clear he is nothing like Nevin Shapiro. Everyone, including Jeb Bush, is raving about filmmaker Billy…

Obama’s Cuban Reform Doesn’t Go Nearly Far Enough

Yenis Delgado is a green-eyed, 45-year-old Cuban beauty. She left the island a decade ago with her husband and young son. Her dad stayed behind, though, and it’s hard to keep in touch. Calls cost $1 per minute. Sending gifts sets her back $50 per pound. “Who can afford that?”…

“How to Twerk” Makes Miami’s Most Googled Searches of 2014

C’mon, Miami… Of all the places in America that should possess an encyclopedic understanding of what it means to “dance in a sexually provocative manner while in a squat, thrusting the hips and popping that booty,” we’d expect the 305 to be numero uno con ese culo. And yet it…

Ferguson Grand Jury Proves Criminal Justice System Is Racist

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. Today, Luke assesses the fallout in Ferguson, Missouri. America took five steps backwards when a grand jury in Ferguson, Missouri, did…