Ozzy Knows Best

Staging a comeback on the same MTV screen that spurred Teen Pop Mania, Ozzy Osbourne not only officially buried the bubblegum phenomenon, he brought back to life the roots of rock and roll. It’s strange enough that the man to revive rock in the 21st Century is a symbol of…

Letters from the Issue of July 18, 2002

Officer, Arrest That Republican And charge him with holding schoolchildren hostage: Regarding Rebecca Wakefield’s article about schools superintendent Merrett Stierheim and wealthy businessman Joe Arriola (“Bleeding Stierheim,” July 4), I think it is criminal that Republicans like state Rep. Ralph Arza are trying to destroy the Miami-Dade County public schools…

Black As They Wanna Be

The camera is trained on two young men holding a Haitian flag. They wear Haitian-flag bandannas, Haitian-flag T-shirts, and Haitian-flag shorts. The girl standing between them whips the Haitian flag up and down to the beat of “Dance Muthafucka!” — the urban club anthem by local rappers Southern Affiliate that…

Letters from the Issue of July 11, 2002

Porn For All Why limit it to mere images? I give a wholehearted two fists up to the idea of the porn industry relocating to South Beach, which Brett Sokol announces is a real possibility (“The XXXstasy Biz,” June 27). Instead of the shallowness currently on display in this sexually…

Keeping Son Real

The last thing Luis Goecoechea planned to do was play in another Latin band. Never mind that he heard nothing but the likes of Orquesta Aragon, Machito, and Chico O’Farrill when he was growing up. “My father would put on his records and say, •I want to hear you sing…

Faking the Funk

It’s pretty hard to ruffle Andrew Yeomanson (a.k.a. DJ Le Spam). After all, this is a man who can keep a straight face while asserting that the inspiration for assembling his Spam Allstars band was seeing Mr. T’s Ten Commandments video. “Come on, ‘I pity the fool who doesn’t have…

The Real Deal

If he has to reach waaaaaay down, Jesus will pick you up. Oh, yes he will! If he has to reach waaaaay down, Jesus will pick you up. Down in the ghetto! Waaaaaaaaay down. Down in the valley! Waaaaaaaaay down. Oh, yes he will! Oh, yes he will! Oh, yes…

Letters from the Issue of July 4, 2002

What We Are Missing Why beat up on Liz Balmaseda? After reading the piece “Buying Time” by Rebecca Wakefield in the issue of June 27, I feel compelled to write. First I think Jim DeFede’s addition to the Herald is as good a move as they’ve made in a long…

Letters from the Issue of July 27, 2002

Ol’ Scraggy Blue Eyes Not everyone in my building hates the homeless: I own a condo here in the Helen Mar and I just wanted to tell you that I thought John Lombardi’s “The Heart Goes For a Haircut” was a great story (June 13). I rarely read the New…

Big Back

No one will ever see the video. The man getting a massage in the first frame is dead now, gunned down last January at a gas station on South Beach. The police don’t know who did it, but that’s not the reason this video will never be released. If the…

Letters from the Issue of June 20, 2002

All About My Brother They’re here, they’re queer, they’re relatives: Well, I’m surprised to hear that Manny Diaz’s brother is gay; like does everyone have a gay family member? (“They’re Here, They’re Queer, They Vote,” Brett Sokol, June 13). Alex Penelas’s brother is quite out and proud, which means the…

Go West, or North, Young Band

Let’s be clear on what kind of town this is. This is a place with great recording studios, phenomenal producers, and engineering wizards, so if you’re a big star and you’ve got a hefty budget, you can lay down tracks here as good or better than anywhere else. Doesn’t matter…

They’re Here, They’re Queer, They Vote

What does Jorge Diaz look like? “I’m just your average Cuban,” he jokes over the phone before a lunch meeting with Kulchur. Well, not exactly. True, Diaz arrives at Coconut Grove’s Monty’s restaurant dressed in a crisp white guayabera and slacks. And despite apologizing for what he calls a sweaty…

Letters from the Issue of June 13, 2002

Of Ramp Rats and Cheap Men What do you mean only in Miami? Well, maybe: That was an amazing story by Kathy Glasgow about ramp workers and what they take from your luggage (“Ramp Rats’ Revenge,” May 30). I have to accept the veracity of your story and interviews, but…

First Lady of Latin Rock

No matter how many times it happens, the moment still stuns. A star shoots from the firmament over Latin America and lands somewhere in Miami: On this June night, Celeste Carballo touches down on an armchair in the corner of a dimly lit living room in the Design District, balancing…

Tyson Agonistes

Sadiq and E-Trap were talking about Saturday’s Mike Tyson/Lennox Lewis heavyweight championship fight from their stools near the stage at Big Mac’s Foxy Lady Lounge, 1800 NW 79th St. in Liberty City: “Mike comes in light — under 220 lbs.? — he will knock that faggot out!” E-Trap predicted confidently…

Letters from the Issue of June 6, 2002

Got a Gripe? Take It Elsewhere, Pal Yes, I know this is the land of free expression, but give me a break, okay? Regarding Alfredo Triff’s article about the vandalism at Maxoly Art Cuba gallery (“Anatomy of Suppression,” May 23), I would encourage all foreign militants to take their wars…

First Legs

In the usually dead hours before dawn, when house lights are dark and the streets of Wynwood silent, an unclassifiable din explodes from speakers hooked into a laptop on the patio behind Two Last Shoes. If the neighbors called the police to complain, what would they say? There is an…

Letters from the Issue of May 30, 2002

So Stupid They Must Work for Castro Who? Those idiots over at Vigilia Mambisa, that’s who: While I always cringe at New Times articles criticizing el exilio, I must say Alfredo Triff’s “Anatomy of Suppression” (May 23) was well deserved by those idiots over at Vigilia Mambisa. In no way…

Street Team Dream

Last year Smilez and Southstar wandered around Miami Beach on Memorial Day weekend just like the rest of the hip-hop hooligans scoping out the honeys and gawking at the stars. Their names weren’t on any of the lists at the clubs on Washington Avenue. Their rhymes weren’t pressed on vinyl…

Letters from the Issue of May 23, 2002

Party Pooper Memorial Day will be a disaster: In response to Rebecca Wakefield’s story “Anatomy of a Party” (May 9), I see disaster coming on Memorial Day weekend, a disaster in which everyone loses and no one wins. Are the Miami Beach town fathers so greedy they have to invite…

Hip-hop Honeymoon

It’s a sound that’s swiftly showing up everywhere, like a suddenly trendy drink embraced by the masses as the perfect tonic for the times. A bracing mix of tough and tender, sweet but street, that somehow makes everybody feel aa-ight in these strange, uncertain post-9/11 days. Switch on the radio,…